amanda

This is Amanda.

She's brazilian. she has a really strong accent but i understand every word she says. i visit teach her. when she opened the door today and saw us she jumped up and down, squealed a little bit, and clapped her hands together. i have to restrain myself from doing the same thing when i see her. she is awesome.

I love her.

Conclusion: i shall make her banana bread.

writing in a journal

I decided to use the most serene time of day to bust out writing in my journal.

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1:30am-5:30am

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It felt so good! totally worth doing again. i don't like writing, but i love having things written down!

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Same time tomorrow?....i'm serious!!

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That's 7+ pages of memory, typed, single-spaced that is now recorded forever. NO REGRETS.

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inn crowd...?

One of the bishopric members shared a thought with us. it got me thinking.




Lately i've been interested in this book by Susan Easton Black called 400 Questions & Answers about the life and times of Jesus Christ [i've learned so much already and gained a whole different perspective of His life and i'm only at the beginning]. she mentions something about the so-called "inn" that Joseph and Mary came across.

"It is not likely that Joseph the carpenter sought shelter for Mary in a public, noisy caravansary [place where travelers stayed]. It is more probable that he looked for a private room to rent in Bethlehem."

She also says, "Failing to find such a room, Joseph and Mary possibly lodged in a nearby limestone cave. Several caves on the hillside of Bethlehem were artificially enlarged, creating an upper chamber used as a dwelling place and a lower chamber intended for animals. It is possible that Joseph found shelter for Mary in a lower chamber in which there was a manger or feeding trough intended for animals."

That paints a slightly different picture in my head that i've never gotten from admiring countless nativity sets over the years. the picture in my head goes from a shack-barn-type structure of wood on the edge of town, to a wet, cold cave in a hillside. when Mary had baby Jesus, she was no older than 15, and Joseph was only about 20. they were both so young.

They were shunned and very much alone as they prepared to raise the Savior of the world. while Mary gave birth to a King in a lonely, smelly cave i wonder where i would have been that night.

I hope i would have been one of the few that believed Mary and Joseph and resolved to do everything possible to support them and make their burdens lighter. i hope i would have been in that stable to witness the divine birth of our Savior and welcome Him into the world and worship at His feet.


I hope that i can keep God's commandments today so that i can have a place with Him in the stable few.

And although the stable few may experience loneliness and discomfort, just as Mary and Joseph did on that night, there is no amount of comfort or warmth i would trade if it meant i would excuse myself from the presence of the Savior. i hope that He can rely on me to be His witness and stay with Him in any circumstance.

It may not be inn, but it will always be stable.

jumbled thoughts, christmas does it to you

In ancient times, it was forbidden to fight in the presence of mistletoe.
In Hungary, Christmas Eve dinner wasn't served until the twinkling of a star was seen outside.
It takes 5 miles of lights to wrap around the entire Rockefeller X-mas tree.
Jack, the skeleton guy from Nightmare Before Christmas, had 400 different heads that they used for the movie.
St Nick used to have a tan suit before some guy wrote about it being red...it's been red ever since.
It takes 15 years to grow an average Christmas tree, which is grown in all 50 U.S. states including alaska and hawaii.

These are some things I learned as I was babysitting last night. there was a music channel on television playing christmas music, and every 30 seconds it would show a new christmas fact on the screen. i was watching it for two hours. there was a lot of interesting info, i don't remember it all though.

The twin boys I babysit are named Andrew and John. they are almost 9? months now, and i started watching them with natalie smith as a summer job...just until school started. after natalie left for college, jenn kept calling me back to sit for them. Jenn was my flute teacher years ago. she and her husband nate play in the phantom of the opera...and nate also works in the lion king and vegas show....apart from other work he has. so they are both busy and need the help with their boys. when i started watching them, they were only 3, almost 4 months old and itty-bitty. when i saw them again yesterday andrew was crawling around and john has four teeth growing in! next time i go they'll have mustaches and be sipping coffee! geez.


when i started sitting for them....


this is andrew


in october....


this is john


them now!

This is one of those "odd jobs" i've been workin lately. but even though it's half an hour away and sorta inconvenient, i just love these boys too much to give it up completely. i'm going to draw the line after december and hope that jenn's nanny can be more consistent starting january. it was good times while it lasted! but i need to find a job that is closer to where i live! it seems like the other two "odd jobs" i have are still on the go though. one, i'm a parttime receptionist at a therapist office. and the other, i'm an assistant to one of my classmates at her own business in children's spa parties. see what i mean by odd jobs? they have nothing to do with each other...but they all pay really good, i have connections in each, and they all pretty much came to me. i'm pretty darn blessed to have little jobs that mostly work around my school schedule and that i really enjoy. the money is appreciated too. ;)

Anyways, so sorry for not writing for a whole week. truth is, i was so nastily sick that i wasn't in the mood to even go online at all really. all i have left from it is a productive throat-clearing cough, but it all started tuesday when i started feeling achy all over. it was the kind that reached down to my bones, and i was shivering so bad at times. mom lathered me in unkers and doterra oils. thank goodness because i'm getting better already - right before a week of finals - and last time i felt down-to-the-bones sick it lasted for a week and a half. i love doterra oils. that's all i have to say. a long time ago, i even helped mom put together a website introducing them: ahealerineveryhome.weebly.com
Miracle workers i tell ya!

Wow. i didn't say anything i planned on saying in my post today. i actually have a lot of other stuff i was going to write down....guess it'll have to wait. one of it is....i've been having some serious dejavu. every day. i feel like i'm living in the past at times -- that's how bad it is. and it's in serious doses. i don't know what's going on. some people think dejavu is bad, some think it's good. i'll tell you what i think when i explain what's going on with me.
Also, is it time i moved to the singles ward? high school all over again? i hope not. but that's what i'm afraid is gonna happen. i never cared for singles ward, but i feel like the family ward is running out of things to offer [me]. i don't know guys. help.

If i don't write again for a while, it's probably because i'm trying to study for finals. 3 more to go and i'm out for the winter.

i ramble sometimes, especially when class is cancelled

Class was cancelled today and what did i accomplish with all my spare time? absolutely nothing.

I was hoping that if i left myself available all day long that maybe emma would come today. i am seriously hesitant to commit to anything right now so that i don't miss the big event!


November is here!

She's pretty much going to come during the best month of the year. :) there's just something about november that i absolutely love. the colors, the weather, the feeling, thanksgiving. i'll leave a more emotionally-accurate post for later times because it's so much more beautiful than i'm making it sound.

But i even wrote poem about it in 4th grade....maybe i'll dig that up sometime for ya. i still remember the title "Tinntinnabulation." it means something like "bells ringing" at least from what i remember. it was written on a paper maple leaf. it was cool.

oh, And i'm just starting the women's murder club series by James Patterson. i'll let you know how it goes.

where's my solid in-between?!

I started a post yesterday and thought i saved it as a draft but nooo i did not.
:( there is a pattern going on in my life, however, and i simply must share.

So yesterday, was day #2 of clinicals (aka fieldwork observation). for this semester, my fieldwork site is at the Torrey Pines Health Center. seeing as it's across the street from csn, i really didn't go very far distance-wise. no matter, i have to observe a rehab facility this time since last semester i observed outpatient pediatrics (meaning kids, and it was so amazingly awesome).

The rehab is actually not that bad. well, before two older female patients openly tried setting me up with the COTA-man there once they found out we’re both single. too bad he’s 20 years older than me and a total flirt who thinks it’s funny to accuse me of drinking his coffee (pshh).

The whole day consisted of me avoiding his flirty-glances, trying to appear "chill" like he wasn't actually a creep, and pretending not to catch on to his nonchalant ways of asking me to go out and party with him for the night. Thanks a lot old ladies who started this whole shinanigan!! They even casually asked him if he likes to dance. he said yes. oh crap i thought. the lady shot a look in my direction and said, "you should ask her to dance." he replied "well, it's not like BALLROOM dancing..." >:(.

unfortunately i'm stuck with this guy since he's the only therapist there on saturdays. i better whip out a certain piece of finger accessory that comes in handy (no pun intended) at times such as this.

On a separate note, Primary today was simply awesome! i'm in sunbeams = 3-4 year olds. usually we have 8 to 10 people in that class and it can be hectic, but today there were only 6, one was a visitor...and they behaved SO WELL! we had a lesson, ate goldfish, did some coloring, put stickers in our sticker books, and there was 15 minutes left over (since they were all doing so good) so we played games. first was a beanbag tossing game (that never got out of hand!) and after that we played a card matching game.

In between coloring and sticker book time, one of the boys (Tru) called me over.
"Teacher!"
I knelt down to eye level "Yes?"
"I love you."

Now, Tru and I have a history, however short, but a history nonetheless. Every sunday he comes to sit by me and loops his arm through mine. three whole times now his mom would come to pick him up after class and he would drag her over to where i'm sitting just to tell her "look! isn't she pretty?" Some sundays he would even compliment me: "you look very beautiful today," & it just so happened that i was wearing a new shirt that day.

So when he told me "I love you", it wasn't the kind of cheery light-hearted "oh teacher i love you!" It was a very straightfaced, matter-of-fact kind of "I love you." dude, this kid's gonna have problems when he's older. just sayin.


But seriously. i have a 30-year-old and a 4-year-old interested, is there no in between for me? all i want is a solid 21-year-old returned missionary! gaaaaaaahh!!!



P.S. anytime now Emma!! :D

backin up

Here i am already talking about my chef skills and goofs, and I haven't even properly introduced myself. I'll just list things (no specific order):

- my favorite weather is warm with dark-type-of cloudy days, not too hot or cold (&no wind!) and i love humidity (i'm weird). i'd love to live in oregon or idaho someday for those reasons
- i still don't have my license. it's true! i need my license to get a consistent job, and i need a job to pay for insurance. it's one of the ruts i'm stuck in. this is long, but just so you know, there are 3 of us in my program that don't have licenses yet, so it's not just me. one is 20 and one is 36! our goal is to get our licenses before we graduate
- there has not been one person yet who has successfully guessed my ethnicity
- i grew up on country music; therefore i love it (except for the super twangy ones)
- i am definitely not picky....with anything. it has pros and cons
- i hate that every friend i've had growing up has really changed and "moved on." long story. but it's affected my ability to make friends.
- i love my beliefs
- i respect people who are consistent
- my hands are always cold. one time my hands were used temporarily as ice packs - in the middle of summer - for a person who got hurt. treatment was successful.
- i can't wear fingernail polish because i get paranoid about it getting scratched up and it makes me feel like my nails are shrinking. oh, except for my thumb. it's usually randomly painted
- benjamin (little bro) says that my nose "looks like ganondorf"
- i am very detail-oriented. and i enjoy even the smallest, simplest details in life. [i've discovered many blessings in my life that way, which were there all along and i just never noticed]
- my biggest enemy is time
- i care more about my family (including friend-family) than anything in the world

some things you should know

Hello i'm new. but before this relationship goes any further i think you should know some things.

ahem. I started a blog back in 2008. it didn't last a week. i guess i never felt totally okay with keeping a blog because i feel too "exposed."

Lately i've been inspired by blogging friends to go back for a more permanent attempt. i'm not the greatest journaler out there by far (yep I implied it. i'm definitely MUCH more of a math kinda gal) but if I have some support to do this I think it might be worth it. well, especially because i know how important it is to journalize things.

After experimenting with other sites (aka muzy & weebly), i ultimately fell back on blogger. simpler is best forsure.

Welp. those are some things i thought we should catch up on. thanks for readin. that is all.

sloppiness disclaimer: i'm leaving grammar to the birds. and this is the best they'll ever eat