there i go a'meddlin

Have you ever wondered what it would be like to have a giant fist go aviating into your face?

Then, as if you were jackie chan or some other action-movie super fighting figure, everything suddenly turns slow-mo and you dodge the punch just as it nicks the air behind you.

I have.

This week i got to experience it first-hand.

On 2-south, there is a bunch of confused, mental health patients there. the patient i was working with was in the bathroom. i waited outside the door for him.

THE ROOMMATE:

"i need to use the phone!! i need to make a phone call now!!!"

THE ROVER (person who roams the hallway):

"have a seat. okay okay. go sit down and you can in a minute."

ROOMMATE:

"i need the phone!!"

*climbs over the rails out of the bed. face is very scrunched up and red. yelling. very profane.*

What was i thinking when i casually strolled over to his side of the room to try to calm him down..?!
It's because people say that i can have a very calming voice! & i've experienced that affect over other patients who were aggravated in the past. [sidenote: never try reasoning with an angry person]

It was working at first....then i said one word, "her". and it triggered the beast to come out of the man. apparently his wife is not a her. he let me know.

POOOOOW! ...except he wasn't very intimidating since i'm slightly stronger & quicker than he is. so i dodged. the rover yelled for help. other manly help arrived. they pushed the patient back into bed.

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I should have been scared. but instead i brushed off the fluster and humiliation. then i had to try not to laugh. why did i think that was funny? it really isn't funny to be punched at.

Maybe because for that split moment, i felt like spiderman in the first movie. the whole scene where the school bully takes a swing -- slow motion -- yeah. that was totally me.

Wha-cha!!!

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Oh, can't forget the after-story. obviously, i still had to hang out in the room until my patient came out.

*ignore the man i did*

However, he was quick to apologize. i offered a slightly cold "apology accepted" response. i then got into a conversation with another person in the room about cars.

THE ROOMMATE

"Do you like cars? i'll buy you a car!"

ME

"You would buy me a car?"

THE ROOMMATE

"Yeah, what kind would you like?"

ME

"what kind is good?"

THE ROOMMATE

"I'll buy you a lexis. they're really expensive, but i'll buy it for you!"

"i'm sorry i got mad"

Needless to say, i'm taking him up on that offer. it's probably just a convenient phone call away....